Why We Should “Swipe Right” on Real-World Relationships

In the workplace, there have never been more options for connecting with others. Email. Instant messaging. Voice calls. Video calls. Slack channels. Text messages. Social media.

The same goes for the dating world, where those seeking romantic relationships can choose to connect via many of these same technologies, as well as through dating apps. 

But maybe no longer. Once heralded as the future of finding a companion (or at least a date), dating apps are starting to look like a fad of the pandemic era, when they were thriving.

 According to a recent survey of 978 college students (the main target market for most dating apps) only 12% said they used dating apps. The reason, according to the same survey, is that young people “say they prefer to meet people in person.”

This shift highlights some key disadvantages of online dating, such as the lack of authentic chemistry and the impersonal nature of swiping through profiles. In-person connections allow for genuine, spontaneous interactions, something many find difficult to replicate through an app.

Contrast that with the workplace where the options for connecting and communicating continue to proliferate. However, the disadvantages of remote working have also become apparent. The lack of face-to-face communication can hinder trust-building, collaboration, and the development of organic relationships among colleagues.

Have the college students abandoning dating apps figured out something the working world hasn’t? Maybe so. In fact, perhaps it’s time we fall in love again with—or “swipe right” on—face-to-face, real-world relationships.

Disadvantages of remote working: What we lose when we only connect virtually

“I’m excited to see people wanting to get back to being in person,” says Tracy Paukstys, an EZRA coach. While Tracy believes strong relationships can be built in a virtual environment, she thinks something is lost when we aren’t communicating in person. “With face-to-face interactions, you can really understand how someone else is feeling.”

“There is something so unique about meeting someone in person that you can’t replace,” says Indrani Halady, Senior Vice President, Europe, Middle East, and Africa at EZRA. “We talk about chemistry, which is so important in both professional and personal relationships. And that chemistry happens when we connect in person.

Indrani admits that post-pandemic, when she again had to commute to her London office multiple days a week, she understood it would be a sacrifice. But she says it has been worth it. 

“The best partnerships we build today are based on the foundations of trust and safety, and I think in some ways they’re easier to develop when we are in-person because it can happen more organically,” she says.

“That’s especially true in the office where you don’t necessarily have to schedule calls or video meetings to catch up with colleagues and, in the process, build that trusting environment.”

Building stronger relationships – virtually or in-person

While there are clear benefits to meeting and connecting with others in person, the best approach isn’t to forego technology entirely. Rather, it’s to employ better strategies for leading others, building connections in the workplace, or even just getting to know others. These strategies include the following: 

Prioritise connections in the workplace

A big downside of connecting and communicating using technology is that it’s almost too easy to do. As a result, it can prove difficult to prioritise building connections.

“I hear a lot of people saying they understand why it’s important. But they’re not finding the time to nurture relationships or build a network,” says Tracy.

“I think it’s a byproduct of the technology available to us and the fact that we’re just experiencing information overload. Everywhere we turn, there’s content and we feel we must try to consume all of it.” 

But passively consuming content, she emphasises, is not the same as using technology to interact with and build or strengthen relationships.  

Be present

“Connecting with people requires empathy and adaptability,” says Indrani. “You need to relate to them or at least understand them, and you need to really listen to what they have to say.”

For leaders, being present and building and maintaining strong relationships with team members is especially critical. And it can be even more challenging if some team members are in-office while others are remote. 

“Leaders must strive to be present and consistently communicate with every team member,” says Indrani, emphasising the importance of making everyone feel like they are part of the team and part of the larger organisation.

Make better use of technology

As technology becomes more prevalent, it’s important to strike the right balance with how to use it. There are plenty of ways we can use technology to improve productivity, without letting it take over every aspect of business.

“We live in a virtual world, but it’s still important for us to go to our clients’ offices to meet them and meet over lunch or dinner,” says Indrani. “Ultimately, the world of sales is no longer about selling a product, it’s about building a relationship and selling a partnership.” 

That dynamic applies to all relationships in the workplace.

“I think technology is a gift. It enables us to do so much more than we would have otherwise. But I think it’s about how we make sure we leverage it correctly while not forgetting about the importance of also sometimes working without technology.

An important best practice in using technology is to maintain boundaries. For example, putting your phone down when having a face-to-face conversation with another person.

The power of undivided attention

Could it be that young people are discovering the value of putting their phones down and giving someone they want to know better their undivided attention? 

“There’s something so exciting about organically meeting someone and building a relationship with them based on that initial feeling you have,” says Indrani. “That’s lessened with a dating app because you’re almost going through a checklist. I think that’s why you’re seeing a transition back to more traditional ways of finding a partner or building a relationship.”

For more leadership insights, visit the EZRA blog.